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Starting again and lessons learned

lolalu

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Hello everyone,

Here I am back again. I was banded in 2011, really successfully. I was so happy with it, I lost a heap of weight and got into fitness in a big way. A couple of years ago, now that I look back on it, my band slipped. Certainly I was having symptoms of it. I ignored it for way too long. For some reason I felt that the slippage was my fault and convinced myself that I had failed. (Isn't that strange?). Anyway, after a few really bad episodes of pretty much complete obstruction, I saw a new surgeon who gave me a (loving and kind) kick up the arse. 

I regained a lot of weight in that time. Eating over those years had become a real nightmare. And, though I became a bit averse to food, and eating in front of people, I still managed to gain weight because I was HUNGRY and only refined foods would be able to get in. I can absolutely say that the maladaptive eating syndrome is real, and can corrupt the most intelligent of minds.

My band came out in November. Apparently there was quite a mess in there. Though I was fearful of losing my beloved (!) band it wasn't a bad thing. I finally could eat salads, other green things and I have really learnt to be able to eat again. Of course I've regained weight, as I think there's more to bariatric surgery than just the restriction. But I feel that this 3 months has enabled me to reconcile my relationship with fresh and whole foods, all of which were not in my repertoire with a slipped band.

I'm on optifast again now - 10 days to sleeve surgery. I really thought I couldn't do it again, but I'm thriving. And finally, I KNOW that my band slippage was not my fault and that I should have admitted it so much earlier. The moral of my story? Stick with your follow ups, they're right when they say we're more successful if we stay connected and, also, don't let self recrimination get in the way of your success (and health).

Love 

LL



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