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beckyboo

Thought i would be happier and that it would be easier :/

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Hi everyone, 

                     i was banded on the 7 of august 2012, i just dont feel it is working i herd that sometimes it doesn't work for people and maybe i am just one of them but i cant say i have done much to help myself i just guessed it wouldn't be this hard, my mum had Gastric bypass on 20th of Feb 2012 and has lost an amazing 78kg i knew a little bit about the surgery i was getting, mainly that it would just help me lose weight but i watched my mum lose the weight and thought it would just be like her....... turns out i was dead wrong and i just cant seem to be able to make my self get up and do it i have the Want just no the will i guess i get so frustrated with my self everyone has expected me to lose weight just like my mum and i cant.

 

 

 

every day i wake up and think okay today is the day i am going to eat healthy and go for a walk but it just never happends, i have never known what it was like to be skinny or at a healthy weight i have always been big from when i was a baby till now so there is no egurge for me to want to get ''back" to that skinny body.

 

i guess i am just looking for some advice and tips on how you all started getting the will power to want to go for a walk or eat healthy and how you had the will power to say no to bad food.

 

help!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

 

sorry for the rant

Thanks beckyboo x :)

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What do you eat in a typical day? If you are having too many calories you won't lose weight.

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I know how you feel beckyboo...a lot of our issues I feel are psychological and nothing is done to address our sense of self-esteem, habits, goals, nothing...

 

Just know that there are people out there that you don't even know that understand and support you.

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thanks guys :)

 

well to day so far i have eaten

 

- a cup and a half for neutral grain with lite milk.

- about a hand full of salted pea nuts 

- and a few chips. 

 

i know its not that healthy but i am really not eating much at all during the day, and for the rest of the day i will probably have another little snack and then dinner.

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Too many carbs. I find if I eat alot of carbs I gain so much weight. Try eggs for breakfast. A cup and a half of cereal is too much aswell - is your band tight enough?

 

Can you see a psych and a dietitian?

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Hi Bec I'm like u have been overweight my whole life was banded in August I use my son as motivation to love really I lost both my mother and father when they were 56 years old and I don't want to leave my son that soon other than that I just want to feel better in me and be the best possible person I can. This is hard work my typical day is 1 egg scrambled for breakfast super quick and easy in the microwave lunch is generally 1 or 2 vita wheats or ryvitas biscuits with some light Philly cheese and a small tin of any flavoured tuna tea is usually chicken or fish with salad or veg NO snacking at all these 3 small meals fill me easily and they are quick easy meals as I work very long stressful hours I change up the tuna for tin chicken or some deli meat or even a slice of cheese and Vegemite occasionally for tea I change the salads to keep it interesting I think being organised is the key gastric bypass is a huge op which your mum had but if you have no luck the sleeve may be a better option for you speak to your surgeon visit a dietician to get help with a meal plan and best of all good luck Hun u can do it if you really want to google is also amazing for recipe idea and this site

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HI beckyboo, 

 

I thought I had failed at lapband. When I was first banded (>12 years), I managed to eventually lose 30kgs. Then I regained this weight. At this point, I thought I was a complete failure. Since then, I lost the same 30kgs two more times over. While the lapband reduced the volume of food I could eat, this was never my primary issue that caused weight gain. My main issue is my addiction to chocolate and ice-cream which easily slips through the lapband. For me, the lapband alone can never solve my weight issues. Over the years, I have been gradually improving my eating and exercise habits. You have to find things that work for you and, for me at least, there are a lot of psychological issues that also have to be worked through. 

 

Just don't give up. Assess where you think you are going wrong and start taking baby steps to work on these issues. Also assess whether you need a fill or unfill. If my band is too tight, I can't eat healthy food and then I turn to junk that easily slips through. 

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Becky,

 

I have to admit that I am struggling to regain my healthy mojo since just before Christmas and all those silly parties etc.  I did work extremely hard in my garden over the holidays and sweated buckets, but I have remained pretty much the same, although today I'm a tad heavier because Im nearing that time of the month and ive blown up somewhat.  Even had to take my wedding rings back off this morning.  I tried last night and they would not budge.  I had to wait till first thing this morning when my swelling was less.  It really sux!  I only just got them back on after putting on too much weight so I feel like Ive gone a little backwards, but I know I need more fill, and I need to put the alcohol away now (which I'm planning to do until Australia Day)

 

Now, I am not one to judge, because God knows I'm not perfect.  But it looks like you need to be a little more selective in your food choices for a start.  For instance, if you were to swapp the salted peanuts for unsalted or perhaps low fat cheese, or fruit, you would be making a small step in the right direction without making a huge change.  Also, its lunch time, so perhaps try to plan your meals a little better then you may not be snaking as much on high calorie/fat foods.  I just had some nice vita weet crackers with avocado and holumi cheese and they were yumm!  I slept in this morning so I did not have brekky.

 

Lastly, go see your doctor , dietitian and psychologist because they are sure to be able to help you.  If you hae the band then your journey is going to be a lot different to your mums.  You should try not to compare yourself to her if you can help it.

You may not have enough fill either, so just give it a little more time.  I'm sure you an me both will find our way.

 

Good Luck,

 

Mel.

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Becky, I can hear the despair in your message, and I worry that you are comparing your weight loss to your mother's.  Please stop doing that.

 

Now, as for the eating...You are the one who controls what goes into your mouth.  You may not be the one who decides what you find in the pantry and the fridge, so you need to speak up about reducing the unhealthy options in there.  If you can't afford a dietician to help you make healthy food choices then use your local library.

 

Now, as far as exercise goes, I too have found that the hardest thing to organise.   I made myself join a gym in the end, and it is purely guilt about what that costs each week that has me drag my body there.  I still find it hard, but do like the smug feeling I get when I have done an exercise session.  But if a gym is out of the question, here are some ideas:

 

Make an appointment with a friend or family member to go walking each day at a specific time.  Write a roster if you get more than one buddy and tell them not to accept any excuses from you. If need be drive to somewhere nice to walk - by a beach or river or a lovely park.  I love walking as the sun is going down - being bathed in that last golden light feels amazing.

 

How to start walking regularly if you really hate to walk:

 

Day One:  Put on walking shoes, a watch, sunhat (sunblock if you need it) and a smile.  Plug some music in your ears if you have one of those gadgets.  (Remember your house key). Go out your gate and walk for five minutes in one direction, turn around and walk back home.  Have a drink of water.

 

Day Two:  Do the same as above but this time walk for six minutes before turning back.

 

Day Three:  Do the same as above but this time walk for seven minutes before turning back.

 

Day Four:  If you think this is getting a bit ridiculous and of course you can walk further than eight minutes, go for it!  Or just do the 8 mins one way and turn back.  No-one is judging you.  It is your choice.

 

Each day do at least the same as the day before, or a minute or more longer if you feel like it, but do it each day. Add a bit of excitement to your day by varying which direction you go in.

 

Day Seven:  After your walk reward yourself for exercising daily for a whole week - with a non-food reward (dvd, nail polish, bubble bath, pedicure.....).  You will know what to choose - you have had all that time walking to plan it!

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Becky I've read lots of your posts and feel your frustration. You've taken the first few positive steps and your banded but you have a lifetime of bad eating habits etc to break. It's not easy. please don't take this the wrong way but I think you would benefit from seeing a psychologist and a dietician. It's a hard journey and you are very young, I think you would benefit from creating a professional support team to support and guide you.

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Oh Beckyboo

 

I'm so sorry you are down but you've put your hand up and I'm sure you will find some great advice and information in the replies.  None of the surgery options are easy but we need to give it the best chance to work.  You have to find the best way for it to work for you...we are all different!

 

Incase it helps you, for me planning is key.  I plan meals for the week and stick to it.  It works for me becuase I don't then grab a quick handful of what ever is close at hand.

 

Also, don't get caught up in the exercise, we are all different.  Start by increasing you accidental (or incidental exercise)  park the car further way, do an extra lap of the supermarket, walk to the furthest door, use the stairs instead of the lift, walk to a colleagues desk rather than phone or email, get off a stop earlier or later than your normal stop.  Buy a pedometer and try to walk a few extra steps each day, then each week...

 

Make an appointment with your clinic - talk to the doctor, dietitian and psychologist...with their help put a plan together, one that is honest and doable. You are their client, they want it to work for you.  It can never ever hurt to ask for help!

 

S

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Becky your honesty is your best tool.

Get the head and heart right first. Then the body will follow.

You are NOT your mum and shouldnt expect to be.

Go for some counselling It sill make a huge difference

Best of luck.

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My best friend had the gastric bypass, she lost a heap of weight really fast, now her weight is slowly climbing again and she has to go for shots as she has a permanent iron/b12 deficiency, in contrast, it took me 2 years to lose the weight and a simple iron tablet corrects the same issue.

 

Initially I was dispondent, now I am glad I didn't consider the bypass at the time. It is best if you don't compare yourself to your mom :(

 

Chin up, check with your surgeon and head to a psych, they will help with the initial phase of being banded, it is a huge adjustment to make in your life. I know, the first six months was the worst for me personally.

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everyone loses weight at different rates, I know people who were banded and sleeved at the same time and the banded one has lost more, there are no guarantees I guess. This is one of the main reasons I've chosen to keep quiet about having had the band done, people have actually said to me they feel that its easy for people who have had weight loss surgery, at times I've felt like slapping them!  Its no walk in the park, band is another tool. I saw a programme on TV recently where the doctors were discussing weight loss chances during an actual lapband surgery. It struck home when the surgeon said, "there its done, lets hope she uses this band wisely"  So I guess maybe you need to go back to your doctor and discuss all this, don't give up too fast, it is a slow process so I'm told. Good luck.

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Thank you so much all of you i know i seem to complain alot but i know that you all understand what i am going though :) i am going to write out a list of food for my mum to buy and i am going to try and sit down with my mum and sister and have a talk about not eating that food that my mum gets me because mum will buy it but by the time i get to eat it its gone so i am gonna have a talk to them and i am going to give my doctor a call on Monday do you call your local doc or the one you go banded from? and  hopefully get all this sorted :) is there any food you recorded that's really good?

 

thank you so much 

beckyboo

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Why not try an ap like my fitness pal. I find it really helpful to record what I eat each day and the calories so I don't have a blowout without realizing. You can also record exercise as well.

An example of my daily menu is :

Breakfast : Home made fresh juice with protein powder or an egg or 40 grams of digestive first cereal

Lunch : dinner leftovers, ryvita with cream cheese and salad

Dinner : protein with low carb veg or salad

Snacks : celery with peanut butter or a mini protein bar - which also helps with chocolate cravings

I do eat junk, I had pizza today, but it fis into my daily calorie allowance because I track it.

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I agree totally with te Psy/ dietitian, and all the othe  advice.

It seems thought, you are FORGETTING you have lost 20%. That is an achievment. You can get a refferal from your GP for counselling sessions that will be free..

Dont be so hard on your self. I think you are doing alot better than you are giving yourself credit for. I got banded at the same time as you. 10 aug and have lost about 15 kgs. lots of people in our monthe lost that before they even had a fill. Its very inportant not to compare with others as it turns into a head f***.

 Its a learning curve for all of us. Take care and make steps to improve as you can, cheers

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Thank you so much all of you i know i seem to complain alot but i know that you all understand what i am going though :) i am going to write out a list of food for my mum to buy and i am going to try and sit down with my mum and sister and have a talk about not eating that food that my mum gets me because mum will buy it but by the time i get to eat it its gone so i am gonna have a talk to them and i am going to give my doctor a call on Monday do you call your local doc or the one you go banded from? and  hopefully get all this sorted :) is there any food you recorded that's really good?

 

thank you so much 

beckyboo

Becyboo you are so young knowledge is the key I highly recomend seeing a dietician so you know whats best to eat, but a base rule is use a side plate entree size about half a diner plate and make half the plate protien....chicken or fish the the other half 2/3 sald or veg and only a tiny amount of carbs or no carbs ike pasta rice bread almost anything white.  Eat your protien first for energy and wellbeing i eat mostly tuna, salmon and chicken now and very little of anything else good luck hun if you cant get to a dietician google high protien meals and make small serves of these and you will be ok even if you do no excersise you should start to lose weigh if your food is right......back in my biggest loser days they said food was 80% and excersise was 20% of the key to weight loss xxx

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I agree totally with te Psy/ dietitian, and all the othe  advice.

It seems thought, you are FORGETTING you have lost 20%. That is an achievment. You can get a refferal from your GP for counselling sessions that will be free..

Dont be so hard on your self. I think you are doing alot better than you are giving yourself credit for. I got banded at the same time as you. 10 aug and have lost about 15 kgs. lots of people in our monthe lost that before they even had a fill. Its very inportant not to compare with others as it turns into a head f***.

 Its a learning curve for all of us. Take care and make steps to improve as you can, cheers

I totally agree we all have different metabolisms and lose at different rates never ever compare your loss to anyone else if you gain more knowledge and eat wiser the kilos will follow at your pace xx

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Lots of great replies and advice!

 

I agree, don't compare your weight loss with your Mum's.

 

I know how you feel about having good intentions to eat well and walk and that just not happening. Remember the band is only a tool. The first 12 months is when you are going to lose the most weight, so don't lose this opportunity. I agree start slow. Walk for five minutes, then seven, ten etc. Get and Ipod. Walk your dog. Park further away in the car park when you go to the shops. Any incidental movement is going to help.

 

You need to eat. After a long plataeu I went and saw the dietician again and I was not eating enough. I strongly encourage you to do this. I kept a record of what I was eating and stuck to it and lost 5 kgs. (Ignore the fact that once work got busy etc that I stopped eating properly and put it all back on, the fact is when I worked hard it paid off). If I'm with people who are eating foods that I shouldn't to resist the urge I have to tell my self that it's 'poison' that it will make me sick etc. Strange I know but it helps. I've done that with soft drink and haven't touched it in 2 and a half years.

 

I also had to say to myself to stop making excuses. I needed to do this for me.

 

Give yourself small goals and reward yourself for when you achieve them.

 

The numbers on the scale drive me. I know I shouldn't but I weigh myself every morning and write it down in a diary no one else sees. It keeps me on track, but I also realise weight fluctuates with cycles etc.

 

I wish you all the best. You remind me a lot of me.

 

YOU CAN DO IT! :)

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I agree with the above comments. I plan my weekly meals in advance and write a shopping list and only buy those foods. I also use a side plate when serving my meals. I am also an exercise-alochic but have learnt the hard way that you have to reduce the calories you eat to loose weight, as exercise (in my experience) can only do so much. It is way easier to not eat x calories than it is to burn those calories off. As long as you cut back on the calories to cause a calorie deficit you will loose weight with or without additional exercise. 

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Thank you so much all of you i know i seem to complain alot but i know that you all understand what i am going though :) i am going to write out a list of food for my mum to buy and i am going to try and sit down with my mum and sister and have a talk about not eating that food that my mum gets me because mum will buy it but by the time i get to eat it its gone so i am gonna have a talk to them and i am going to give my doctor a call on Monday do you call your local doc or the one you go banded from? and hopefully get all this sorted :) is there any food you recorded that's really good?

thank you so much

beckyboo

Beckyboo u don't complain alot! It's good you seek support from ppl who somewhat understand what your going through.

In regards to your question - yes go see ur surgeon, he/she should be able to refer you to a dietician - I strongly suggest you see one as they will give you a balanced meal plan, this will help with you weight lose and how you feel daily - energy, etc. The pyscologist maybe see if ur surgeon suggests one but if u see your GP they should be able to put you on the Medicare mental

Health scheme - I believe u get 10 sessions covered by Medicare (thus may have changed) but at least u won't be out if pocket. Let us know how u go

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Thank you all for your support i have deiced and i am going to do a low to no carb diet for awhile and see if it works also going to start drinking green tea and see if that helps me i am so glade i have found this group i know i have been abit depressing on the site but know i think it is time to get my butt in to gear i have 10 days till i go get another fill and get weighed at the doctors so heres hoping to lose those kilos in 10 days :) 

 

thank you some much again :) xxxxx

beckyboo

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I am also afraid that I will fail with the band and that it won't work for me. I know I eat when I am not hungry and I know I eat junk food because I love chocolate. Snacking is a real killer to any weight loss - band or no band. I know, I am a snacker and hence have weight problems.

 

When I heal from surgery, I am considering joining weight watchers because the weekly weigh ins and chat with someone might help me. I also have a personal trainer, so even when I had a long day at the work I need to go see her or I waste my money. Sometimes, I cancel bc I can't be bothered but then it's an extra session next week and I am not keen on that either.

 

Think of the positives, you have not gained more than you have lost.

 

Tips

- Drink only water. No soft drinks (even the diet variety)

- If you must drink tea or coffee, make it water based with a tad of milk.

- Buy unsalted nuts. Peanuts are yum but Brazil nuts, walnuts and almonds are better for you nutritionally. only eat a small handful (5-6 small nuts) as nuts are high calorie food

- Drink water based hot chocolate to ease the craving for sweet or chocolate.

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Good onya Becky. I'm also one of those people that just can't do carbs often. my body just stores them. I no longer eat carbs or starchy vegetables after lunchtime. As for finding the willpower to eat healthy, now its just what my body craves. Set yourself a 30 day challenge to eat healthy and your body will detox and adapt.

My typical daily menu is:

  • Breakfast: Half a wholemeal english muffin topped with baked beans. (sometimes I will put cottage or riccotta cheese under my beans).
    OR     1 Weetbix with skim milk, and slice banana on top.
     
  • Lunch: a vita wheat lunch slice (cracker) topped with lite cheese, sliced tomato or cucumber, and most of a tuna temper tin.
    OR      green salad with feta and 1 and a half panfried chicken tenderloin. (Tenderloins are much friendly band portions), with balsamic dressing.
     
  • Dinner: The green salad with chicken
    OR       A palm sized piece of fish (Basa, Barramundi or Salmon) with steamed or stirfried vegetables.. Occasionally I will ad half a small potato or some pumpkin to my dinner.

I am never hungry between meals but if my head is telling me to eat, I have a big glass of water or diet cordial, or a cup of tea. If I am still looking in the fridge, I will have some fruit like a handful of grapes or some strawberries.

Planning your meals in advance and not keeping junkfood in the house are the biggest advantages, although it can be hard if other people do the household shopping.

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