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Advice for loved ones

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What did your loved ones do which was helpful in assisting you? My fiancée and family are very supportive of me having a Lapband done which is awesome. I'm just wondering if there's any advice I should give them. I plan on buying an extra Portion Perfect bowl and plate to keep there for when we visit. Is there anything that your loved ones did which helped you? I plan on doing the cooking class that BMI offers to their patients. Also what advice were you as a patient given that has helped you? 

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I'm quite honest with friends and family they know I can only eat a small amount and if I politely excuse myself from the table they don't ask why and there's no awkwardness.  (stuck moments)  I have discovered recently avoid Dim Sum/Yum Cha you have to eat too fast it didn't end well...

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With adults, I find their reactions funny. Most adults actually tend to eat LESS around me than they normally would, like some kind of subconscious gesture of solidarity. I find myself telling people not to worry about me and eat whatever they want :) I just sit there wishing I could fit more but just enjoying watching others eat and being able to chat.

@@t_elle - that is bizarre, I find the opposite with yum cha. It's like going to a sushi train, just hang out, pick at what you want as it comes. I don't feel any pressure to eat quickly. Were you being shooed out for quick turnover by staff or something?

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My partners family tend to now cook meals that are band friendly or at least partly band friendly. They haven't asked but know that soft veg and fish and chicken, slow cooked meals are easier for me eat. They always let me serve my own plate which is a relief, my partners mum just says, come in and serve yourself. My European grandmother wants to load my plate but I just say sorry I can't eat it and she is cool. I always have an optifast in my bag for major stuck moments where I find myself starving afterwards, it's a good little saviour in desperate times and can be mixed in a glass with a spoon if you don't have a shaker on hand. 

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My partners family tend to now cook meals that are band friendly or at least partly band friendly. They haven't asked but know that soft veg and fish and chicken, slow cooked meals are easier for me eat. They always let me serve my own plate which is a relief, my partners mum just says, come in and serve yourself. My European grandmother wants to load my plate but I just say sorry I can't eat it and she is cool. I always have an optifast in my bag for major stuck moments where I find myself starving afterwards, it's a good little saviour in desperate times and can be mixed in a glass with a spoon if you don't have a shaker on hand. 

Having optifast with you is a great idea! 

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Initially I took my little favourite fridgey bag with me to dinner/lunches with family. I saw it as, the surgery was my choice and it wasn't fair for others to cater to me. So I'd bring my bag along with either tuna, soup or Optifast. It stopped temptations for me and I felt "safe"... if that makes sense.

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Initially I took my little favourite fridgey bag with me to dinner/lunches with family. I saw it as, the surgery was my choice and it wasn't fair for others to cater to me. So I'd bring my bag along with either tuna, soup or Optifast. It stopped temptations for me and I felt "safe"... if that makes sense.

That's fair enough. I plan on taking my perfect portion plate to my in laws too although I'm undecided if I'm going to tell them about my band. They're really good about dietary needs too - my fiancée is on a really strict diet for his Muay Thai fight and his mum rang to ask if he had any special diet requests. 

I do think taking along a special meal or an optifast is a really good idea though just in case it is something I can't eat or my band plays up. Also with being out on the run having something with me is a good idea in case there's no suitable options (I also try not to buy food on the go because it gets expensive). 

All of this advice is great! 

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With adults, I find their reactions funny. Most adults actually tend to eat LESS around me than they normally would, like some kind of subconscious gesture of solidarity. I find myself telling people not to worry about me and eat whatever they want :) I just sit there wishing I could fit more but just enjoying watching others eat and being able to chat.

@@t_elle - that is bizarre, I find the opposite with yum cha. It's like going to a sushi train, just hang out, pick at what you want as it comes. I don't feel any pressure to eat quickly. Were you being shooed out for quick turnover by staff or something?

Yep they were bringing the food around way too fast.  It was also mostly pork and I don't eat pork, the only thing I could eat were the prawn dishes and the first one I ate was tough and chewy so instant stuck moment and no more eating for me.  I did have a mango coconut pudding thing at the end, I was so hungry by that point...  I have requested we not go back to that restaurant.

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Yep they were bringing the food around way too fast.  It was also mostly pork and I don't eat pork, the only thing I could eat were the prawn dishes and the first one I ate was tough and chewy so instant stuck moment and no more eating for me.  I did have a mango coconut pudding thing at the end, I was so hungry by that point...  I have requested we not go back to that restaurant.

sounds like a dodgy one @t_elle

Dont lose faith in yum cha, its too awesome. Do some research and find a quality place :P

 

I have to say I actually disagree with talk about people taking food or optifast or whatever. Personal choice but for me, being sleeved is about changing my life, not about feeling like I'm on a permanent diet and scared to eat things. Sometimes we are in environments where there are no 'great' choices, and you just pick the best of a bad bunch. Given the little volume we can eat it's barely going to register anyway. I don't want to live stressing about what food there might or might not be. 

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sounds like a dodgy one @t_elle

Dont lose faith in yum cha, its too awesome. Do some research and find a quality place :P

 

I have to say I actually disagree with talk about people taking food or optifast or whatever. Personal choice but for me, being sleeved is about changing my life, not about feeling like I'm on a permanent diet and scared to eat things. Sometimes we are in environments where there are no 'great' choices, and you just pick the best of a bad bunch. Given the little volume we can eat it's barely going to register anyway. I don't want to live stressing about what food there might or might not be. 

Not dodgy if you like pork, it smelt amazing too until I walked out to the bathrooms to fix the stuck prawn situation, then all I smelt was pork...   There is a better one nearby we usually go to and we will go back there next time.  They are also very quick to bring the food around but they have a better variety and I had no issues there.  There's queues down the street for both locations, they give you a raffle ticket and you wait for your number to be called to get your table.  Yum cha is quite popular in Perth especially the good spots so they want to turnover the tables pretty quickly.

Optifast definitely has it's place in my life still.  When I had issues with my band earlier this year, it was causing reflux and everything was getting stuck, Optifast was a godsend for helping me feel full and actually being able to keep something down.  I just had a month off for stress leave from work, during that month I didn't walk nearly as much as my job involves lots of activity annndd being an emotional eater I totally fell off the wagon and chocolate became my friend again... 2.5kgs was the total gain.  I also found my appetite had increased and I've been struggling to get it back on track so have been using Optifast as my lunch followed by some yoghurt around 3pm and no carbs at dinner. 

I started this on Monday and have lost 800g already so happy it's helping!

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I think everything is quite simple. If you think that your best friends pie is disgusting, you should be opened to say it (only if he/she asks). If you are not honest with them you are scared of their judgements. Are they friends in this case?

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