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Happyfrog

Getting back on track

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I was banded November 2012, starting weight 141kg. everything went well. Got down to 95ish kg almost goal weight, only 4kg or 5kg off. So pretty happy. Then I was diagnosed with depression and found that I was eating things I shouldn’t be and my meal sizes increased. I gained little bit, I sat at around 102kg. After 9 months I was able to get off the depression meds and I was determined to get to goal weight. Short time after that hubby and I decided we were going to have another baby. Anyway long story short. I gained weight during pregnancy I got to 117kg, had my band refilled when Bub was 6 weeks old. And it all went down hill from there. My meals were fine, but I found myself snacking. Then post natal depression hit me. And I turned to alcohol. I wasn’t drunk or anything I was having 1 maybe 2 drinks almost every night and a lot more on Friday nights. This made my weight go up. I got to 126kg I was so angry at myself. I was treated for depression and got back mentally where I was, but I was still drinking to my alcohol. Bub is now almost 17months. 

So 6 weeks ago, I stopped drinking. I haven’t had a single drop. I have cut out all soft drink, I don’t drink tea or coffee. So I only have water. My meals are almost the size they should be. My snacking has stopped. Don’t get me wrong every now and then I have biscuit or something but not often. I started a new exercise routine called bodyboss 4 weeks ago. which I get done while Bub is having her morning sleep. I have lost just over 4kg which has averaged to 700gm a week. I have been documenting everything. Writing all my feelings good or bad down. I guess I’m writing this because this morning when Bub went down for her nap, I got a case of the ‘don’t wannas’ I really didn’t want to go and do my exercises I just wanted to sit. I’m not sure if because it was quite cool here this morning or The fact I’ve had a headache every morning for over a month. Or what. But I did get my butt up and went and did it. I feel better for it. 

I think by putting this on here and having other people who may have struggled like me, I feel more accountable and maybe I might stop dwelling. And maybe my headache will go away, well I can only hope. 

Anyway that’s me at the moment. 

 

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Hi

I have the exact same issue as you but driven by family loss and work pressures. I am really struggling to give up the alcohol entirely as cravings are killing me. I have put on 12 kgs in last 9 months and it just keeps creeping on and on. I am really disappointed and down with myself and just cant seem to break the cycle. Really considering getting a sleeve.

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I’ve been thinking about changing to the sleeve but can’t justify the cost. Getting out of the headspace is the hardest part. I was to the point of why did I do this , why did I spend all that money. What a waste. 

i found it really hard the first week or so to give up the alcohol, and when Friday came it was hard to walk past the grog shop and not go in. I asked hubby to get me a drink on Friday (10 weeks since my last drink) as I had a hectic crazy week with kids and renovating and my daughter moving out of my room and in with her sister, and I drank one and it was good. I had a second and I didn’t want it. I’m just not interested anymore. So I feel that’s a huge leap forward. 

‘At the moment I’m having problems, when I eat I’m am really nauseated, I have stomach and back pain. I burp a lot. I booked in to see my surgeon and can’t get in till Monday as he is in theatre all this week. I had to see my GP for a new referral, so he is testing me pancreatitis and sent me for an ultrasound to check for band slip. I told him ultrasound won’t see anything. But he didn’t listen, gabbled on about CT scans is a lot of radiation blah blah blah. When I got to the X-ray place this morning he said this test is a waste of time, you need a CT so they changed the test. Rang the GP this afternoon and he has asked to see me about my blood tests. So I’ll wait until the CT results are in. I’m hoping I get some answers soon. I’m afraid to eat. Even liquids are making me feel like crap. 

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I haven't gone through the surgery yet.

But I know the struggle with alcohol.

I'm 34 I stopped drinking 3 years ago it was hard but it was the best decision but I had been drinking on and off since I was 18 but had my first drink at 13..

It's possible

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Glad to have you back. Good on you for realising you had a problem and changing your mindset. I recently lost my grandma and I'll be honest I've been eating too much crap. It feels ok at the time then I feel guilty and feel bad physically. I need to get back on track also. Let's keep posting when we need the support and try to change the negatives for good habits. I hope everything is ok with your band and your check up with the surgeon goes well. 

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Yes I know the eating to much too, when I turned to alcohol I started snacking. Depression hit me hard. Then the guilt from eating turned to more eating. It’s a vicious circle. 

‘Got my results. I don’t have pancreatitis or a slipped band. All my organs are healthy. They think it’s a stomach ulcer from stress. So I’ll see my surgeon on Monday and see what he thinks. And go from there. I’m now on nexium. I’ll see over the weekend if it helps, I hope so. I hate feeling so rotten after eating or drinking. 

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I weighed myself yesterday and took all my measurements. Since kicking myself in the butt on the 31st of January when I did my first weigh in and measurements I have lost 9.3kg and a total of 61cm. With 15cm of that off my waist I am so happy so far. I’ve lost an average of 550gm a week, and I couldn’t be happier. I didn’t lose any weight during the period that I was really sick. I’m unsure why as I was hardly eating. But that could be why too. 

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I am also on the Merry Go Round! Was first banded 13 years ago. Lost about 30k and over the years put 20 back on and lost 10 again. Net loss 20kg. I never expected it to be so hard and thought that I would be strong enough to keep it off. I feel like I am constantly fighting my body. When I try to lose weight I don't. When I say to hell with it and don't care, I do lose weight. So frustrating and counter-intuitive. I am going back to the surgeon Wednesday next week to get the fluid increased and try to go back to an early stage of restricted eating. Inspired by Happyfrog. Well done you!

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I have read so many post about complications and success stories on here. I feel I’m a success as in I don’t have any complications, besides the port flip, right at the beginning. I can lose the weight if I eat correctly. I just had to struggle with my brain about what and when I was eating. Post Natal Depression didn’t help.

my intention to post was to say, hey look your not alone. Being the only one in my family and friends with the lapband, I feel alone. If and when I have a stuck moment, it’s embarrassing to have to excuse myself to deal with it. And then to be asked when I get back, oh did you throw up. To which my answer is usually no, it went down when I was walking, regardless of wether it did or not. I hate it. I don’t get stuck moments very often. But I do. I usually find it’s when I’m out and I’m dealing the kids and I fail to chew enough. 

MerryGoAround I hope you can get back on track too. 

 

Oh also, my 16 year old is now feeling like she’s eating to much and wants to starve herself because the girls at school called her fat. She is far from fat. She’s a healthy size 10-12 and quite tall.  Girls are so bloody cruel. It pisses me off. 

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Thanks for the support Happyfrog. Back to the surgeon tomorrow. You are right it is a struggle with the brain. It's just unfair that some people can eat massive amounts and are totally skinny and others eat a tiny amount and gain weight. There is something in the unfairness that I retaliate against at my own peril. I think counselling should have been mandatory post banding. It was only offered to me after about 4 years which was too late really to maximise the success of the early days. 

Kids can be really cruel. They are so quick to judge and there is nothing worse than body shaming! That's the sort of message that can really mess with people's heads and have long term consequences. Keep giving her the strong message.

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